2009 has been…. A blur. Seemed like everytime I blinked, the calendar had advanced days, weeks, months in that instant, and now im only an eye-opening away from ’09 being nothing more than a vision in my rearview. At least that is how I plan for it to be, so certain things have to be LEFT in 2009, not carried over into 2010. I want the best of my 2009 to be the WORST of my 2010, and the worst of 2009 to be LONG forgotten in 2010.
*UNDERSTAND – this is not a process that just takes place as soon as 11:59pm December 31st, 2009 becomes 12am January 1st, 2010.* Anything I deem a ‘New Year’s resolution’ is not something that I’m jus gonna start working on on 1.1.10, it’s something that I’ve BEEN working on since I determined that it was something that needed work, just that a changing of the year (or actually the decade now) just gives a logistical ‘new beginning’ so to speak. Nothing is gonna CHANGE, I just want to further my own GROWTH. So with that said, I shall break down my own course of action for how my 2010 shall be great….
First thing and most important thing I HAVE to leave in 2009 is my penchant for worrying about things that are beyond my control. I have control freak tendencies at times, so I fret when I don’t know a situation 360 degrees or I cant control it at all. Whether my female situation, the job hunt, or anything else in general, I think its really just added unnecessary stress. I figure if I can stop thinking about the things I can do nothing about, it frees up my mind to focus on actually altering the things that I DO have control over. This will probably be the most difficult one to actually accomplish, the one that I’ll really have to focus on on a day-to-day basis. Just have to learn to let go.
I also have to really get myself back to keeping in contact with people. People that mean the world to me, that I keep close to my heart, still end up feeling neglected in a way, because at times I dont show that to them, whether by a text, or to be less impersonal, a phone call. Sometimes I think the Internet is to blame, simply because a Facebook wall post, a Myspace message, or a Tweet just doesn’t equate with a phone call, or just going to see someone.